Jakarta, 22nd June 2020

Past traumas will not just be gone like that and could return at our outmost unexpected moments. When that happened; the choices are to remain quiet and got more even slumped down or try to rise and reconfigure the cracks which have turned into debris.

The arrangement will never return to perfect wholeness, but from those experiences we could find a new fragments as spaces to seek for peace.

Quoting words from the novel 'Amigdala: Perjalanan Merepresi Memori' (Amygdala: Journey in Repressing Memory) by a writer who is more comfortable addressed as Ega Mpokgaga;

"Life is about how you face failures from so many plans that you had meticulously constructed. Life is about how you face fears of uncertainties and various possibilities which may take place any given time."

And that was my journey reading every word in sentences that encapsulated a story about Ishtar, a woman survivor of domestic violence who tried to re-live her life again just as the way it was. 

The plot of this fictional novel was presented in a non-linear storytelling style; where I was always made curious to read the continuity of each chapter to get a more wholesome story skeleton.

Generally, a story would be narrated in normative sequence, but we will not find that in Amigdala. Every individual chapter may not always be directly connected. This is the element that maintains the story to remain interesting for us to follow. Moreover, conflicts happening in every chapter were not layered or piled up.

Reading Amigdala is like figuring out a puzzle where pieces of conflict given randomly in each chapter slowly build a wholeness to the story. Meaning, every new conflict at the end will deliver resolution to previous conflict - and vice versa.

Ishtar is a female character who appeared strong but poses gentle characteristics. This book is a collection of her life story's sequences in a journey to try and forgive her past and also to make peace with herself.

Ega pictured the characters in her story in her own unique ways. Perhaps because this book stands on a woman's perspective, I viewed that every male character in the book was portrayed with bits of feminine elements - either from the selection of words in their dialogues, or the description of their physical movements.

To me, this is something good. I could understand better how women viewed their opposite sex. Of course, it is very different from what I (as a man) would see about other men. To me, it's like Ega had written the preface of a book where I then interpret through my personal experiences and understanding as a man. 

At the least, this aspect helped me to sharpen the mindset of every male character within her story. Let alone with the storytelling style presented in two different perspectives; the joy to explore all characters could not be more intense.

Oh, and by the way, this is another element that I like about this book. Two different perspectives. This storytelling style appeared to give different atmospheres for scenes happening simultaneously; but with two heads telling their individual versions of it, that one particular scene of situation became two entirely different stories.

Overall, this book reveals the dark side of a toxic relationship. About how what thought to be the best choices could eventually turn out as the wrong things. The story theme is quite heavy, while the conflicts presented were very realistic. I could almost tell the differences between which elements were fictional and which were based on personal experiences.

Overall, the language style used is quite simple and easy to digest. The story indeed contain heavy conflicts and I am sure this would cause different impacts to readers who have had experienced similar situations. Therefore, I would suggest people to free their most relaxing time to read the book.

Amigdala: Perjalanan Merepresi Memori is the first paert of the Amygdala trilogy universe by Ega Mpokgaga. Can't wait for the next two books.

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You can read the original post in Bahasa Indonesia here.

Translation by @deanbenitez.